The Goddess Weighs In

Living Large and Healthy

Who is the Goddess?

on March 13, 2012

About a year ago I dated a guy who was into Tantra and referred to me as “the Goddess”.  He didn’t last, but I liked the moniker and I’ve always identified with those goddess sculptures with their curves and ample hips and thighs.  If you see me on the street though, feel free to call me Cynthia.

I was the fat kid.  By the age of six I was about five pounds heavier than other kids and gradually each year I gained a few more pounds until I was more than one hundred pounds heavier than my peers.  I have tried most of the popular diets and plans, a few of the diet fads and even a few completely harebrained schemes like a plastic blob that I was supposed to stick in my ear to stimulate pressure points and pills that were supposed to turn to gelatin in my stomach and take the food with them. I’ve fasted, I’ve abused laxatives and I’ve cried.

I don’t blame anyone for my size, those around me did what they thought was right, but there will be future blogs about parenting and fat children and the importance of modelling appropriate eating and exercise.  I’ve always wanted to be one of those “outdoorsy” types who steps out of a MEC catalogue and stomps around the forest with a canoe on her head, but truth be told I like to nest on a comfy couch, watching TV and knitting. I dream of one day owning my own farm and growing my own vegetables and I rip pastoral pictures from magazines and keep them in a book, but I must admit my attempts at gardening thus far have been lacklustre.

Lest you think differently being fat is not all bad.  I was bullied for a short period as a pre-teen and while that doesn’t seem to jive with the previous statement, in fact it taught me a lot about people and who to trust and how to spot them.  I have a lot of friends that I’ve had for a lot of years and it might have been easier for them at times to hang with the cooler kids, but they’ve stuck by me.

Dating is a different story.  I was single for a lot of years because people who loved me told me that I needed to be thin in order to find a partner.  Well I am happy to say that that is not true.  The funny thing is that at times the fat girl can sympathize with the tall, leggy blonde.  I don’t know how many guys I have talked to or actually dated who were more interested in my curves than anything that might be in my head or coming out of my mouth. Objectification, apparently comes in all shapes and sizes.

So that’s me, or at least a little bit about me.  Perhaps you see something of yourself in these words, or perhaps you don’t, but I hope you keep reading.

– the Goddess


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