The Goddess Weighs In

Living Large and Healthy

Roller Derby Girl

on March 29, 2012

All too often we spend time with friends and we sit and eat.  We may laugh and talk and carry on, but overall our socializing is sedentary.  In an attempt to curb this habit and to celebrate my intense love of the movie Whip It and my budding fascination with roller derby in general I decided to throw a roller derby party.

I planned two hours of roller skating at a local roller rink followed by roller derby inspired fare at my home.  I was unsure if friends would be interested when I asked them to save the date, but most everyone made themselves available and they were eager to don the four wheels.  I was thrilled because I had images of me in skates and full eyeliner hugging the boards all by myself.

In the end nine of us went skating and seven came back for wings and other treats.

Unfortunately my dreams of being a roller derby champion are unlikely to be realized given that I only made it around the rink once.  It seems when I was twelve roller skating was easier or I was fearless, but either way I was a bit of a disaster.  Having said that I stayed on the skates for two hours and I figured out that I could skate a straight line from entrance to exit and get off the rink and skate back along the carpet and do it again.  This strategy, I noticed, was also adopted by a number of small children who demonstrated similar prowess on the skates.

In my defence once we got back and settled in to our dinner and shared our skating victories and misshaps one of the recurring comments was that the skates were not as well maintained as they could have been and so at times the wheels jerked and pulled.  To be honest I thought the problem was me so while unfortunate, I was glad to hear that they had struggled a bit as well.

Regardless if you are in the West End you might want to check out Scooters (  For around the price of a movie we got to skate for two hours. While the skates need some attention as I mentioned it was not a bad place for some active fun with friends. And despite my foibles I think I may invest in some skates of my own.  Eventually it will save on rental costs and I will be able to keep them in good repair.  These might be in my price range or these look kind of cool but I will have to do my research to make sure I pick the right skates for me and my needs.  There are roller derby skates available for a mere 599.00 dollars, but I think I’ll wait and save up for those.

For a bit more fun after dinner I gave out prizes for the best roller derby names, the best roller skater and the like.  I could not participate as I was the host, but in case you’re wondering my roller derby name is the Incynerator.

And lest you doubt I actually went skating – check out the pics.  I’m the one in the blue skirt in case you are unsure.

– the Goddess



6 responses to “Roller Derby Girl

  1. taji0143 says:

    My roller derby name is Dyke Vader.

  2. ivygrrrl says:

    I had such a great time being Kimmie Dat Chainsaw for the day! I actually did better than I thought I would and would totally go again! Thanks again for the fun times, the yummy treats, the lovely gifts and the amazing company!! I think we’d make a pretty good roller derby team!! 😀

  3. I never did come up with a good name. Probably just as well, I am far too brittle and unbalanced for roller derby. Skating around in a circle, I can do, but the bashing and banging is not for the likes of me!

  4. Side note, what the hell is Linda doing in that picture 🙂

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